God’s Brand of Weed Killer

I sat quietly in prayer, too quiet. Asking myself what is going on here? I should be praying for others, and here I sit in dark silence. My mind blank. What is wrong? Vacant awareness left me lifeless, a vast void holding me captive. I started reading my Bible, but the words didn’t trigger joy or renewal. I cried out, “Lord, what is wrong with me?”

I am wondering if you have been there too? Trapped in a Godless void wondering what you have done and where our Heavenly Father has gone.

In the past whenever I bounced back and forth between feeling strong in faith and an unloveable lost puppy my mind would race with questions.  When I asked what was wrong with me, the answer came from Satan, who had planted seeds of unworthiness, perfectionism, fear, isolation among others long ago.  Those seeds grew into thorned bushes that impeded my path.

Slowly the bushes were pruned until they could be cut out. Frequently something would burst through the ground at the first sign of spring from a leftover root that took life on its own.  Zap! Time for Weed-Be-Gone.

God’s brand of weed killer is “Trust.” When we think He left, often, He is waiting for us to reach up to Him and trust. We haven’t done anything wrong, and He loves us. Nothing can keep Him from loving us.

Trust doesn’t come easy for most of us. It takes practice. Trust confirms our belief and builds our confidence in Jesus over influences of the world around us.  By the time thornbush appears trust is there to choke it out.

When we feel the void, it is a reminder to reach up to our Heavenly Father. We take time to figure out what we are holding on to or seized back. As we pray this out with Jesus, we acknowledge our faith which is strengthened by the process. The process repeats over and over again.

The process makes us stronger.

We reach for God earlier.

We trust more until one day it feels normal.